MIGRAINES AND STRESS

OR

"STRESS CAN KILL YOU."

Chances are you have heard the expression: Stress can kill you. You may think it means that a really stressful environment or job can literally make you sick.

But stress lies not so much in exterior circumstances and events, as in how we RESPOND to them. How often do you get so wound up and worried about something, that the muscles in your upper back all the way to the neck and the jaw are so tense they are rock hard, and painfully aching? A lot of times this tension also affects your head and you end up with a throbbing headache, maybe a migraine.

Was the worry worth it? Did your getting upset and making yourself sick change what happened? Did it prevent whatever you were worrying about? Did it make the situation even the slightest bit better? Or maybe -- did the thing you were worried about never happen, or did it turn out to be not nearly as bad as you thought it would be?

In any case, the event itself didn't make you feel bad; you did.

To think that all that mental discomfort and physical pain was self-created is astounding. Why do you choose to make yourself feel bad?

WE LEARN HOW WE 'SHOULD' FEEL

We are literally taught how we should feel: We grow up believing that certain events REQUIRE certain responses from us. If a majority of people in your society think you should be upset when A occurs, chances are you will learn to get upset when A occurs. What is worse, you may also learn to feel GUILTY or stressed if you do NOT get upset on cue. As if we owe a certain emotional response to society! If you think this is extreme, think if you have ever heard the following comments: It just isn't human to feel that way. Or He just didn't look sad enough. Says who? Why should someone else have any say in what we feel? The simple answer is: they shouldn't.

We owe it to ourselves to choose those feelings that are most beneficial to our well-being.

WHAT IS THE BEST ROUTE TO OUR WELL-BEING?

And what is the best way to feel? There are individuals who would say that the most important thing we can do in each moment is to make the best of that moment and to feel as good as we possibly can -- even if that means virtually disregarding current circumstances and focusing on the future that we want. (Some go as far as to say that our emotional state should be stable, even, peaceful, at all times, and un affected by external events.)

These individuals say that what we think is what we draw to us, it is what we create for our future. And that what we choose to think about and how we choose to feel in each moment is literally pre-paving our future. And that it is our resistance to situations that leads to all stress and illness.

What does that mean to someone susceptible to migraines?

CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY

For me, this has meant that I literally stop many times a day if I feel bad (emotionally or physically) and say to myself: I want to feel good. How can I change this situation -- or how I look at it -- so that I feel good (or at least better)?

Maybe my response is that I don'thave an argument with someone, because that really isn't what I want. Or maybe I will deliberately un-tense my shoulders and relax my upper body muscles. Or maybe I will turn my attention from one thing that seems to be going wrong and notice that half a dozen other things in my life are just wonderful.

Does this help? Yes, it does. If you get migraines, you know that some kind of stress is what precedes most of them. Deciding that I do NOT WANT TO RESPOND in a way that is resistant and makes me feel stressed is one I have to make repeatedly every day, but one of the best decisions I make every day.

TWO IMPORTANT REASONS TO CHOOSE CALM

What is another reason that being calm/not being stressed is helpful to someone prone to migraines? When you are stressed, adrenaline is released from the adrenal glands -- the little glands on top of the kidneys. You know how adrenaline makes you feel. It¹s that blood pumping, fight or flight feeling. The problem with this? If your response to stress keeps making the adrenals pump out adrenaline, this continual stimulation will lead to depleting the adrenal glands. This interferes with blood sugar regulation and leads to symptoms like fatigue, tremors, and headaches .

You may want to check out the books I describe in the right column -- they very clearly explain this approach to life.